The rejected John Terry excuses
As John Terry is investigated for alleged (definitely alleged) racist abuse of Anton Ferdinand, we broke into the Chelsea PR department and nicked one of their paper files. Yes, we thought it was odd they used paper files still, but there you go.
We then found that Chelsea had actually considered a number of other excuses and reasons why John Terry definitely didn’t do it. Because he definitely didn’t do it.
Not to lawyers, this is a joke. It is not serious. At all.