Wednesday Wide
Well, I wake in the morning/Fold my hands and pray for rain/I got a head full of ideas/That are drivin’ me insane
Carlos Tevez
Carlos Tevez is back to win the Premier League for, Manchester City. Possibly United. City are hoping that Tevez will manage to behave himself for the next three months in order to reinvigorate their faltering away form. United are hoping that he’ll be making yet more statements insulting his manager, Bobby Em, for treating like the c…haracter he clearly is. Given that a couple of days back he complained about being treated, ‘like a dog,’ we can only hope for the world’s sake somebody decides to have him put down.
AN
Human rights
Apple have finally admitted they have a human rights problem at some of the factories that produce their toys for idiots. To reasonable people, the reaction would be, ‘Yes, I read. Now can you sort it out?’ To people with their toys for idiots, Apple will have correctly guessed they also read, and were also already aware of these problems, and yet chose to buy the products anyway. This is the perfect admission, making you look marginally better in the eyes of your detractor, yet having to do nothing to your already tolerant customer base. And their mice and trackpads are stupid.
This is England
Young people shouldn’t get drunk, says Dave-o Cee, with characteristic empathy. Most subsequent criticism has dealt with the fact that he did drinking at university, but lots of us did things then that we ask others not to do now, and there’s a difference between young people boozing in university society and young people boozing in society. The question, therefore, is this: what other antidote is there to the fucking disgusting Britain he’s preparing for them?
DH
Photo courtesy of Well Offside


