An Open Letter to Open Letter Writers
Dear Open Letter Writers,
The subject of your open letter will never read your open letter, perhaps because they can’t read and definitely because you are a nonentity. The open letter is solely for your own ego, benefit and reputation in the eyes of other morons, so instead, why not just tell them that you intend to write an open letter, guzzle the plaudits and actually spend your time plotting an asphyxiwank.
P.S. You know what always does succeed in getting people’s attention – self-immolation.