Liverpool 6-1 Brighton & Hove Albion – as it happened
Liverpool gave a hopeless Brighton a sound thrashing with the aid of three own-goals. Even Andy Carroll got on the scoresheet.
Photo courtesy of WellOffside.com
FULL-TIME: Liverpool 6-1 Brighton A streaker heralds the end of a productive day for Liverpool. Brighton were terrible, with the exceptions of LuaLua and, until his comical own-goal, Dunk. Liverpool were good but not brilliant, and they’ll progress to the next round. Of course. Stand by for our reflections in a wee while. Thanks for reading.
88 min: This is over, basically. I mean no disrespect to Brighton by that. But they’ve been awful.
86 min: Dunk’s keepy-uppy goal can be found here, courtesy of 101 Great Goals. It really is something.
GOAL! Liverpool 6-1 Brighton (Suarez) Suarez gets his goal after all. Liverpool simply advance at walking pace, and the Brighton defence offers no resistance as Carroll collects a cross at the back post, heading across goal for Suarez to nod over the line from point-blank range.
Saved! A dreadful penalty from Suarez, who waited for Brezovan to commit himself to his left side, and then shot there anyway. The keeper comfortably saves, and then uses his leg to hook the loose ball clear.
Penalty to Liverpool! Kuyt was brought down as he ran clear. Suarez to take…
78 min: Credit where it’s due: it takes a brave man to head the ball back to his goalkeeper from an opposition cross when your team is 5-1 down and three of them were own goals. But that’s exactly what Dunk does. Well done. Brighton have fallen apart here, as evidenced by the scoreline.
GOAL! Liverpool 5-1 Brighton (Dunk OG) This is quite unbelievable. Liverpool penetrate the Brighton defence with the most routine of attacks, and after Brezovan spills a cross, Dunk is fortunately there in front of the open goal to… play a bizarre and impromptu game of keepie-up, drifting over his own goal-line as he does so. I have no idea what he was attempting to do there, and it’s marred what was otherwise a good display from him. But that really was unbelievably incompetent.
GOAL! Liverpool 4-1 Brighton (Bridcutt OG) Another own goal from Bridcutt. Liverpool execute a counter-attack, and they look to have fluffed their lines when Henderson floats a terrible fall far too early, short, and high for Gerrard. But Brezovan hesitates, and Bridcutt completely misjudges the header, allowing Gerrard to shoot. Brezovan makes the save, but Gerrard gets to the rebound on the byline by the post, and cuts it back across goal, where it bounces off Bridcutt and into the net. Unlucky again for the Brighton defender, but it was also his incompetence that led to the opportunity.
69 min: Mackail-Smith is on, and in his first attack Brighton spread the play well – they’re getting more players involved in their attacks now. In the end, LuaLua’s cross is too deep, but Brighton continue to apply the pressure.
65 min: Brighton try some proper pressing, and it pays off – a series of sloppy play out of their own area leads Liverpool to give the ball away in a dangerous position, but Noone’s cross is poor and easily cut out.
63 min: As Brighton come forwards in search of a route back into the game, their defence is disintegrating rapidly at the back. No matter how many men they hurl forwards, LuaLua still seems their only source of creativity, while Dunk is performing a similar one-man show at the back.
59 min: Kazenga LuaLua tricks his way past Johnson and pings a ball into the area. As with everything he does, it’s hit very hard, and neither Vokes nor Barnes can react quickly enough to make use of it.
GOAL! Liverpool 3-1 Brighton (Carroll) Carroll goal, Downing assist. No comment.
Oh, alright. Downing escaped a terrible tackle from Bridcutt as he moved into the left channel, then burst into the area and provided a cut-back for Carroll, who met it with a firm strike past Brezovan. Game surely over.
54 min: Brezovan really has been very dodgy today. Downing unleashes a powerful effort straight at him, and he palms it directly back into the winger’s path. Brighton defenders soon crowd him out, but it’s not a performance that instills much confidence from the Brighton keeper.
53 min: Ridiculous from Brezovan! He comes out to beat Suarez to a long ball, but makes a right hash of it, leaving Suarez and the ball untouched and the goal gaping. Suarez, though, seems oddly hesitant and is eventually denied by a blue-and-white shirt storming back to get the ball clear. That should’ve been 3-1 and game over.
51 min: Another penetrating attack from Liverpool. Downing gets down the left and dinks a cross into Carroll, only to see it cleared by Dunk. Gerrard is lurking on the edge of the area, and unleashes a shot which, despite help from a deflection off Henderson, goes wide.
48 min: Liverpool go on the attack through Gerrard, only to see him chopped down as the ball is played to Suarez. The referee plays advantage, and Suarez exchanges passes with Henderson before attempting to lob Brezovan. It really wasn’t on, and the Brighton ‘keeper catches with ease.
We’re off again. Noone is on, Buckley is off. Noone is apparently a lifelong Liverpool fan and did some building work on Steven Gerrard’s house.
HALF-TIME: Liverpool 2-1 Brighton An absorbing half comes to an end with Liverpool having just taken the lead. Brighton have very much been second best however, and it’s difficult to see them having too many opportunities to equalise once more. They’ll need something different in the second half. I’ll be back shortly for it, don’t go anywhere.
GOAL! Liverpool 2-1 Brighton (Bridcutt OG) After a spell of fine Brighton play, Liverpool take the lead courtesy of a right goalmouth scramble. Brezovan, who has not looked confident at all today, punches a ball up into the air, where Suarez meets it with a volley. It’s cleared, but only to Glen Johnson, who stabs it goalwards. Vokes clears it off the line, but it bounces off Bridcutt and ends up in the net. Unlucky for Brighton.
41 min: LuaLua looks quite incredible – so much so that one wonders why Newcastle let him go on loan and kept Obertan. He storms down the left-wing, turning his run inside, but a poor decision does for him – he should look to cut it back but attempts to beat Reina at his near post, and finds only side-netting. He is, however, the only Brighton player who is providing much threat. He looks genuinely scary when he gets the ball.
39 min: CHANTWATCH: ”You live in Brighton, you know what you are.”
38 min: Brighton lead an ineffectual attack, from which Liverpool counter – Downing whacks a firm cross into the area with Carroll once again the target, but Dunk gets ahead of him to clear it well. Both sides look like they’ll be content to go in at half-time with the scores level.
35 min: It’s not Carroll’s day at all. He tussles with El-Abd and is denied a weak penalty claim, before a deep, high cross from Enrique is aimed at him and he comes a cropper from the same defender.
32 min: Carroll misses a fine chance! Gerrard curls in an excellent ball to give him a free header with Brezovan stranded, but he nods it over the bar. Liverpool are all over Brighton here.
30 min: Immediately afterwards, Carroll is all hands whilst challenging for an aerial ball and falls foul of the referee’s whistle once again, much to his and his manager’s bellowing consternation.
29 min: Gerrard whacks in a cross for deep with Carroll the target, but the attentions of Dunk put him off. He bellows at the referee, citing obstruction. Nothing doing.
27 min: Calderon clears off the line! Suarez darts inside from the right wing, slips past a couple of defenders, and whacks a curling shot to the far post. Brezovan is utterly beaten but Calderon has positioned himself superbly to block the shot and prevent a certain goal.
27 min: LuaLua hammers a cross in during a rare Brighton attack, but it’s far too hard for either of Brighton’s waiting players in the box to make use of.
25 min: Enrique robs Buckley down the left, and goes on a fine run, shaking off Calderon and cutting inside, where he cuts a poor right-footed shot wide of Brezovan’s near post.
23 min: Suarez receives the ball in the Brighton area during a panicky spell for the South-coasters, and he escapes the attention of three surrounding defenders with some jinking footwork. Eventually, a leg deflects the ball away to Carroll, who is all alone and has plenty of the goal to aim at, but a lack of time and technique cause him to scuff it badly and Brighton survive.
21 min: Downing dinks a ball into the six-yard-box for Andy Carroll, who deflects it back across goal where there are no red shirts waiting to capitalise.
19 min: Adam finds Suarez making a run out wide with a fine slide-rule pass, and the Uruguayan – who hasn’t had much of the ball yet – gets a chorus of boos. Calderon does well, using his nous and muscle to win the ball.
GOAL! Remarkable! Liverpool 1-1 Brighton (LuaLua) What an absolute scorcher! LuaLua receives the ball from a wee tap-back and absolutely leathers it around the badly-positioned and undermanned Liverpool wall right into Reina’s near post. He should’ve had it covered but it was hit so hard that it had nestled in the corner of the net before Reina knew what day it was. An absolutely tremendous strike and from nothing, the scores are level.
16 min: LuaLua goes on a fine run, cutting into the centre from the left-wing, until the pursuing Henderson brings him down. A decent opportunity from the free-kick…
15 min: Liverpool get a free-kick and Brighton don’t pay attention, allowing the ball to be passed sideways to the waiting Gerrard, who blasts it from 25 yards. It zips wide.
13 min: Downing whips a good ball into the Brighton area, but Carroll can’t quite get enough on it. Brighton need to sort themselves out here if they want to stand a chance.
11 min: Liverpool win another corner, but it’s cleared easily. Since they’re the most knowledgeable fans in the world, at half-time the crowd will be asked en masse: When was the Battle of Breitenfield? What is an Archimedes’ screw used to transport? And what is Andy Carroll? Brighton fans pre-empt us and challenge the Anfield crowd for their title, with a rousing chorus of “What a waste of money.” It’s just like Eggheads, this.
9 min: “Some of the most knowledgeable fans of the game… enormous expectations” says our co-commentator of the Anfield crowd. I’m in no mood for paradoxes, not at this hour.
7 min: Brighton look to approach the concession of an early goal with a positive attitude, attacking with numbers and intent, but they’re let down by an awful cross from Calderon when there was nothing on. Suarez then almost gets a shooting chance, but the Brighton defence holds firm.
GOAL! Liverpool 1-0 Brighton (Skrtel) A Stewart Downing snap-shot earns a corner after Brezovan tips over, and from the resultant corner Liverpool take the lead. It’s a very simple affair, Gerrard floating one to the near post, where Skrtel is able to get to it unmolested, flicking it into the goal. Awful defending from Brighton.
3 min: Poor control from Suarez causes Liverpool to cede possession and Brighton threaten down the left wing on the counter, but Gerrard is back to stop them in their tracks.
1 min: Guss Poyitt is on the bench. Whereabouts of Goose Poyay when we get them.
And we’re off. Hold onto your enormous styrofoam digits.
An email reaches me from Andi Thomas, the title is ‘Banter’, and the contents are this.
Let’s hope, in the interests of humanity, Liverpool fans keep the chants nice today. Though don’t bore me with any faux-indignation over ‘we can see you holding hands’ or other such popular ditties, which I happen to think are quite funny.
Gus Poyet’s guide to managing in the Championship: Sign a Spanish international and former Valencia winger slash playmaker. BENCH HIM.
The picture you see illustrating this MBM is of course at Brighton’s ground. Yes, they’ve gone and got themselves some cheerleaders. Something I loathe, and not just for the reason you’re all thinking. Perhaps Brighton are trying to shake their image, although it screams overcompensation to me. I’m sure their uniforms are the best-designed in all the land, mind.
Preamble: Well, it’s the FA Cup, innit. They wrote some numbers on some balls. They assigned those numbers to some teams. They put those balls in
the fridge a bowl. They took the balls out of the bowl without looking. They looked at the numbers. They made the corresponding teams play one another. That’s how it’s gone down.
Today, it’s decided that LIVERPOOL will face BRIGHTON & HOVE ALBION. If you want some subtext, Brighton’s manager Gus Poyet defended his compatriot Luis Suarez during his recent problems. So there.
You may also like to keep abreast of what else has been going on today.
And now you’ll be wanting your team news. Here it is.
Liverpool: Reina, Johnson, Carragher, Skrtel, Jose Enrique, Henderson, Gerrard, Adam, Downing, Suarez, Carroll. Bench: Doni, Maxi, Coates, Kuyt, Spearing, Shelvey, Kelly.
Brighton: Brezovan, Calderon, Greer, Dunk, El-Abd, Buckley, Bridcutt, Navarro, LuaLua, Vokes, Barnes. Bench: Ankergren, Noone, Mackail-Smith, Vicente, Harley, Vincelot, Agdestein.