You can’t choose your fans

Of course, whether you view association with individuals as good or bad is highly subjective. When Lazio fans unfurled a banner in support of Serbian war lord, Arkan, it was met with widespread condemnation and disgust around the world, but the Ultras on the Curva Nord seemed rather pleased with themselves. No doubt they’d be appalled if they discovered a famous left-wing philosopher supported their team. Even so, should we tar all Lazio supporters with the same brush? After all, you don’t have to be a fascist to support Lazio, although, let’s be honest, it probably helps.

To conclude, there’s really not much you can do to prevent your club from unwanted attention, or to limit your exposure to idiocy among your ranks. However, as with many things in life, a reference to The Simpsons provides practical solutions (see Homer the Great). In Arsenal’s case, a re-branding of the Gunners as the ‘No Assholes Club’ would provide a much needed filter. And if Piers Morgan was at the door, protesting that Michael Winner had been allowed in? Sorry, Piers, it says No Assholes; they’re allowed one.

Follow Michael here.

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