Match Report: Real Madrid 0 – 0 Valencia

No goals at the Bernabeu, but there were SHOTS, SHOTS, SHOTS, SHOTS, SHOTS SHOTS, SHOTS, SHOTS, SHOTS, SHOTS, SHOTS SHOTS, SHOTS, ...

Battle of the Handshake: Manchester United defeat Liverpool, the MS Paint Report

Lads and ladies, I readily admit to struggling with this introduction. MS Painting is a toilsome time suck as ...

The MS Paint Report: Chelsea blows a 3-nil lead at home to Manchester United

Once upon a time in 2010, Chelsea won the Premier League. LOL I know right? But seriously, it happened. ...

MS Paint Match Report: Arsenal regain some dignity as Manchester United beat them at Emirates Stadium.

Hello my lovelies! How long has it been since some proper MS Paint reporting? I’ve missed you too, but ...

While I Was Out

BZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ HEY BITCHES! It’s me, your friendly neighborhood vuvuzelist! You may have feared/hoped that I’d gotten lost in the ...

The Big Match Report, Christmas Edition: Manchester City 1 – 0 Arsenal like you’ve never seen

Merry Xma$ yall! Ho ho ho! Jingle jolly jangle Julie! Tis the season of English football and God bless ...

Liverpool FC statement

Luis Suarez has been banned for eight match and fined £40,000 by the FA today for, in the wise ...

Illustrated Premier League Match Report: QPR 0 – 2 Manchester United like you’ve never seen

A comfortable win for United, they now top the league and may stay there if the noisy neighbors lose ...

Match Report: Club World Cup Final: Barcelona 4 – 0 Santos

Barcelona are champions of the Club World Cup. Neymar, who turned Puyol inside out the one time he was ...

The Valencian Reunion: Chelsea 2 – 1 Manchester City like you’ve never seen

By now everybody’s either seen the match, or highlights from the match, or read about the match, or what-have-you. ...

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